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karlakolumna

karlakolumna

I ❤ reading. Once started I don't seem to be able to stop. Many sleepless nights are the result of that particular addiction.^^ 

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J.M. Snyder
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Timur Vermes
In the Flesh (Flesh, #1) - Ethan Stone I wasn't sure whether to rate this book at all, seeing as I didn't--couldn't--finish it. I've been trying, struggling, really, to read In the Flesh for 2 weeks now, but it's going very slowly, mostly because I just can't seem to like anything at all about the book. Everytime I start reading I put it away again shortly after in order to do something else, anything else, just so that I don't have to read anymore... So, maybe it's unfair of me to rate the book when I haven't read the whole thing (stopped reading after ~70%). Well, but I am so very annoyed and really need to let off some steam. It's 1,5 stars, at the max (for me).I absolutely dislike the way Ethan Stone has written this book. I haven't read anything else by him so far, so I can't really say if it's his writing style all together that I don't like, or if it is just this one book. Anyway, the narrative style often resembles a simple summary of events, told without any passion, heart, soul. This story is told in 1st person POV, something I usually really like and which gives the author a great possibility to lend the MC a unique, interesting voice. To give the reader great insight into the MCs character. This author didn't manage that at all, IMO. Cristian Flesh tells his story so utterly dispassionate and really so extremely unappealing... Ugh.First, the sentence structure--the whole way of narrating the story, really--often is rather simple and clipped. In whole passages all sentences start with one and the same pronoun (i.e. "I" or "He"): I did this. I went there. I did that. Then, I saw that and did that.... That was so immensely distracting and annoying, it made my hair stand on end. You probably know the feeling when something is really bugging you, it might not even be something big, maybe just the buzzing of a fly, but it is just tremendously irritating that there really is nothing you can do but to concentrate on it. And the more you try not to, the less successful your attempts are...Well, that's exactly how this read was for me:At some point I couldn't concentrate on anything else besides the aforementioned (quite "striking") sentence structure that I didn't catch any of the content although having read it mere seconds ago. I couldn't even appreciate good or funny parts (there were some) anymore.I think that this way I've probably dimnished the reading experience all by myself, kind of obsessing over something that isn't (objectively) all that big to begin with... But, well, it really is/was bugging the hell out of me.Here 2 examples [to ensure you that I'm nut a total nut case ;)]:Excerpt #1: I wondered how he knew how to get bloodstains out, but didn't ask. I grabbed the clothes and stepped into the bathroom. The bathroom was as big as my bedroom. I stripped my dirty clothes off and opened the shower door. I saw the water knob, but didn't see a spout. Unsure what to do, I turned the knob, and water began spraying out from all over the shower. “Damn!” I stepped into the shower and let the hot water rush over my body. I heard the bathroom door open.Excerpt #2: He leaned over me, rubbing his cock on my balls. He tried to kiss me, but I turned my head to the side. He smiled at me, kind of sad like, but it didn't stop him. He kissed my neck and sucked on my earlobe. He grabbed both our cocks and stroked them together. (...) He stood and went into the bedroom. He returned with a condom and a bottle of lube. He slid the condom on and resumed his position between my legs. He prepared to enter me.This really is so bad it hurts! Grr.As if that wasn't bad enough already, Cristian Flesh makes for a very bad MC. This guy is extremely - there it is again: annoying and I really did not like him at all. And I might add that this is quite strange, because Flesh has all the characteristics I usually like, scratch that, love in a main character: He's kind of an asshole, doesn't want to let anyone get too attached to himself, well, all in all: Tough on the outside, but soft on the inside...even if rather deep inside. Cristian Flesh, however, is the first character - who has most of my favourite character traits (in a fictional character) - whom I can't stand one bit. He's a whore (I don't specifically have anything against having fun with different people, but in Flesh it is, for some reason, rubbing me up the wrong way, because the guy literally doesn't have a single thought besides "cock" or "fucking" or "sex" in his head!), he's shallow, he's narcisstic, and he behaves like a total pimp/bitch. He's supposed to be a tough guy but he really resembles more a chick. I don't know how the author managed to do that, but there it is.He constantly calls his lawyer "big guy" instead of "Colby", which is the guy's name. When he should be worrying about his trial he can only think along the lines: How to get in my (possibly gay) lawyer's pants the quickest way?And even when he does nice things, like paying the hospital bill for a kid he met a couple of days ago (and fucked twice as often already), I don't buy it. There are so many points in the book's favour: MC = asshole with soft core, crime plot, mystery elements, police officer/detective, things I really prefer in my books. It really should have been easy for me to like In the Flesh, but instead, I ended up totally disliking everything about it.I honestly can't name one thing that was to my liking.And I really can't suffer through one more page, even though I'm remotely positive that the crime/mystery plot is a decent one, even though I'm actually kind of interested in how it will all turn out, but, seriously, it's not worth it. I couldn't care less about the MCs, about Cris Flesh in particular, although I'm kind of rooting for him to end up in prison or dead (Yeah, I really do hate him), and the narrative style doesn't do the book any favours.In conclusion, it feels very good to get all my resentment and chagrin about the book out of my system, kind of therapeutic...